The short version of Lily's birth story is this: If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans.
The long version is slightly more complicated…
On Friday (40 weeks, 6 days) we went in for our appointment and to do a non-stress test to make sure everything was good with the baby. Things for the NST went perfectly. The amniotic fluid index was definitely not the same story. They don't want amniotic fluid levels to go below 7, really, but anything below 5 is really bad. The tech did the ultrasound and I had a whopping 2.5 cm of fluid. Because of the conversation I'd had with my midwife in the appointment prior to the testing, I knew this meant induction. The baby's health and safety were at risk, so even though I was really upset about it I knew that I wouldn't fight it because getting her out safely was my biggest concern. My wonderful midwife allowed us to be discharged from the hospital after the NST so that we could go home and I could collect my thoughts and get my head together after having a breakdown about the induction.
Matt and I were able to go home and make sure we had everything we could possibly need. We called our pastor and I was also able to go in for confession and we received a blessing. The thing our pastor kept saying was to pray for peace, which was quite difficult after hearing about the induction.
When we got to the hospital, I was checked and wasn't far enough along to go with Pitocin but I wanted to avoid that as much as possible anyway. We started with a drug called Cytotec which I took every 4 hours. I wasn't making much progress at all after about 12 hours of that, so we decided to do a Foley Bulb which is a manual, more natural method of induction. It started contractions at about 8 am Saturday morning. Unfortunately, things weren't progressing like they should be and even though I'd made some progress, at about 5 pm my midwife said that Pitocin was probably our option. I wasn't ready for that so I asked for 2.5 hours with my doulas to see if we could get things going. By the time the 2.5 hours were up, I was exhausted and had made no additional progress. At that point, I consented to start Pitocin and hoped that being on the continuous monitor and the more intense contractions wouldn't force me to give up my dream/goal of a natural birth.
As it turned out, I was kind of a rockstar at labor. From what Matt, my doulas, my midwife, and the nurses all told me, if you didn't know I was in labor you wouldn't believe it. By about 4 am, I was really having to focus during the contractions and make sure someone was rubbing my back as they were going. I decided to sit on a chair instead of laying in bed like I had been because there was a little less pressure. That's when things started going downhill quickly. I sat on the chair and Lily's heart rate dropped from 120 to 60. It stayed consistently low for 9 minutes. I was put back in bed, on oxygen and told to roll from side to side to get her heart rate up. After being told a c-section was a real possibility, I started to pray the Hail Mary desperately. Right after that, her heart rate popped back up and we were back on track…for about two minutes. After that, her heart rate dropped again and after it was down for a minute, my midwife said we were doing a c-section. I was basically in a state of shock at that point but I was okay with it.
After having a couple of meltdowns the prior day because things weren't progressing as I was hoping, my doulas sat down with Matt and me and we talked about what I wanted, how things were going, my mental state, and we prayed together. From there, things just started going wonderfully and I was able to really be at peace with my decisions. I thought it was pretty crazy that even Pope Francis tweeted about peace as well. I felt like God was speaking directly to me through this experience.
Because of the prayer, I was able to be at peace with things as they were happening and roll with the punches much better. I also knew that with possible brain damage as a side effect of Lily's dipping heart rate, getting her out was the absolute most important thing in the world. So I was wheeled to the OR. The one thing that was terrifying for me was that Matt wasn't there. The last thing I did was ask everyone in my vicinity that they tell him I love him since I wasn't able to and I was a little terrified. Because I had labored totally naturally to that point, I had to go under general anesthesia. I am told that Matt did a wonderful, wonderful job of making sure that our wishes were met and taking care of our sweet girl.
When I came to, I was asked if I knew where I was and I had no idea. And then I saw Matt holding our baby and it all came back. I was a little woozy, but he asked if I wanted to meet our baby. I got to check her sex myself instead of being told, and Matt told me a little of what had happened. He had held her skin-to-skin the entire time he'd had her per our wishes and had just done a brilliant job of making sure we got as much as we could out of the experience. Our wonderful doulas were taking pictures and telling me how proud they were of me.
Even though it ended up exactly the opposite of everything I wanted, Lily still made it safely into the world and I had my totally natural birth until the c-section became a medical necessity. So it wasn't all bad. I'm definitely saddened that I was totally unconscious for her actual birth, but she has been so perfect. Breastfeeding has been a breeze, which I was worried about with a c-section baby and the surgeon and my midwife both told me I am an excellent candidate for VBAC, so hopefully next time I'll have the birth I planned and prepared for.
Call me crazy, but I am so excited to do this all over again.